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littleasianfairy
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Name: Alison
Birthday: 1/11/1991
Gender: Female
Interests: stars, dark blues, black, interisting shades of light green, running cross country, shopping online, scented candles, rain, falling snow, dancing in my room without a care in the world to music that i love, tacking things to my wall, apple cake, reading books out-loud, laughing with my friends and being alone with people that i love, admire and appreciate
Expertise: basically, all of the above
Occupation: Student
Message: message meEmail: email me
Website: visit my website
AIM:  littleasianfairy
Yahoo:  littleasianfairy@yahoo.com
Member Since:
7/27/2004
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| wow. xanga is all fancy schmansy since last time i signed on. weird.
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| i'm starting to think about not returning to school. maybe i can make a living cutting other people's lawns or something. i'm just not looking forward to school starting and seeing him again. i still haven't replied to the letter, maybe i should just not answer at all.
so i had a really fun time yesterday. a-rod made us run 1200 repeats in the woods, so the whole team piled into steph's van and went to, get this, "Waa Kee Sha Park." that's right. i never knew we had a forest preserve off of reservation road, but apparently, waa kee sha park is the place to hit up if we're going to host a meet this year. and we got to run in the woods which was pretty fun 'cause of the twigs falling on you randomly and running with trees on either side of you and the sunlight barely touching your head just gives you that sense of flying out of a tunnel into a green meadow. gods, i love running in the woods.
i really need to stop eating yogurt. that's basically what i've been living on these past weeks. yogurt, cheese its, and an occasional apple. how healthy, i know.
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| [on stars] well, i've been spending a lot of time outside, nowadays. summer is the time to escape from the clutches of the house and all. mornings are spent running, me and my girls, we run fast...afternoons are spent trying to escape the heat by locking myself in the closet with lights off and my music playing. plus i can get away from people if i'm locked in the closet, seeing as i'm rather sick of seeing them these days. i can sit for hours and hours in the darkness. says something about how my days are occupied, eh? evenings are spent with family and nights are spent with just me and the maple tree. i found a little space in the neighborhood about 5 blocks away from the house. it's nice. no one ever passes by and it's really cool at night and the best place to look at stars is in the branches of a maple tree. i miss star gazing with him. i miss a lot of things. but mostly i miss him.
[on flowerpots] i actually considered giving him a flowerpot. it started out as a joke with whatshisface, wilson, but now i think it might actually work off some steam i've been holding in. i spent twenty minutes at home depot staring at a flowerpot that reminded me of him. it was tall and thin and had these pretty etchings on the rim. but i didn't buy it. chances are, i'd smash it before i ever got the chance to deliver it to him. but gods, he needs a flowerpot. someone needs to give him a flowerpot. the jerk.
[on forgiveness] i think that i might actually be able to forgive him, eventually. as amanda so quaintly puts it, "guys are ." i guess i just have to forgive him for being a guy, then, neh? i can understand why, i mean, i was just some stupid hope of mine that started it and it never would've worked, anyways. i've been thinking about him a lot. i haven't even written a letter back, yet. i'm still thinking about what i should write, or if i will write back at all. the roses on my shelf are dried out now. i have thrown them away. i guess it's time for me to change and move on, too. the things that you learn from roses...i think i might be able to forgive him. never forget, but maybe to forgive. as chanel puts it, "i try not to hurt myself thinking about it more than he has already done." i'm moving on. i have moved on.
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| well, i never liked him that much anyways.
i'm going to go hug my teddy bear and talk to the candy wrapper on my bookshelf and cry.
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| pues...my aunty vivi is visiting from california. she's arriving on saturday along with her little kid [duy] and i shall be looking forward to that. california is loosing a large asset. illinois is profiting.
the cross country practice battle is still raging. thus far, i have not officially recieved my running shoes back [although, as i discovered, they are handily hidden in the back of the washing machine] but i have been taking them from their secret hiding place anyhow. i walk/jog to practice now, but i have to be careful to avoid the main roads in case my mother happens to be in the passing bus. coach knows about my being banned from going to practice, so he turns a blind eye if i dive into the bushes suddenly when a school bus passes by when we're running. and i did not go to practice today, despite what jorie says. i was at home. doing the dishes. like a good little girl. and the mud on my feet was not from running in the rain with the other girls. no, i only got splashed when getting the mail. i did not go to practice. no. i didn't. [*cough*]
on the other hand, i have found the delight of oozing on the futon and doing nothing. granted, i am not allowed to do this quite as often as i like, but i manage to find at least 15 minutes a day to sit and do absolutely nothing except think/doze/dream/secrete strange substances? bliss...
no word from him yet. i think he's scared to reply. oh well, i was getting sick of it anyways. it's a two way street and so far, i'm the only one going down it. nuh uh, not gonna work that way, bub. i'm moving on.
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